I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis