I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
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