I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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