the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize