the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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