yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.