We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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