so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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