I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
