We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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