She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.