what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
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