Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
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this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
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