As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
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Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
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I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Randomize