dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
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I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
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I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Do you have feelings for this penis?