Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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