Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
When are your genitals available?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Randomize