Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize