Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
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i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
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somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.