you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
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