I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
You smell like a Billy Joel song
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
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I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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