Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.