uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize