it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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