my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
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