I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.