im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
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