those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize