i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize