the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
