hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize