Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
