just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize
