we're chasing vodka with high fives
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize