This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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