You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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