week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
