Well douche your snatch and let's go!
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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