I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
