I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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