Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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