I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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