Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize