She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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