I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
