I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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