I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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