Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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