After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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