just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
If I die, sorry about rent.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize